Now that I’m…well…older, I’m starting to think that plastic surgery isn’t such a bad idea…although even the name make makes it seem scary…plastic…that’s what it usually winds up looking like…you look like your face got laminated…which gets really creepy when the rest of your body falls apart…like this woman I talked to once…just once…thankfully…and she had smooth skin on her face…a fixed joker smile…and hands that looked like they were covered in very cheap, very worn naugahyde,,,Now the smooth skin I guess they tighten…but what’s with the Botox…I hear it paralyzes muscles in the face and thereby…somehow…removes wrinkles…how does that work?…my muscles aren’t wrinkled…well, they’re practically non-existent to tell the truth…so how does paralyzing them smooth out the skin on top…actually, just getting the bill would probably paralyze me with fear…so would my whole body be smooth then?…somebody told me how much she paid for the treatments…I told her that if she’d just give me five dollars, I’d have snake bite her on the face…cut out the middle man…note I didn’t call her my friend…what really, really creeps me out are those lip implants…the ones that look like someone bent an inner tube in half and crammed it in their mouth…now that is SEXY…you don’t want to get near lips like those…lips like those latch on and don’t let go…it’d be like kissing a bathroom plunger…but all this finally gets to my Mr. Potato Head idea…for those of you too young to have experienced the magic of the Mr. Potato Head in days of old…when we used to huddle together in caves for protection…you used a real potato, and stuck various body parts…eyes, nose, ears, mouth, legs, etc…into the potato…and then you bake it…well, you’re not really supposed to bake it…that gets you grounded and seeing a psychiatrist before you’re 12…or so I am told…anyway, if I was God…besides the fact the fact that life as we know it would no longer exist…I’d make us all like Mr. Potato Heads…then we could exchange body parts…”Hey, I like your ears…wanna swap?”…”I think I’ll try the blue eyes today”…”I’ve got a date tonight…did I say I’d be a man or a woman”…’course it would make for some really interesting crimes…and the threat “I’ve got your nose!!!” would have to be taken much more seriously…did I start off by saying plastic surgery wasn’t such a bad idea?…